More writing

June 1, 2026.Reading time 6 minutes.

I told myself enough already but I can’t seem to or want to stop writing about sister number 3. It’s like an outlet for me, my mobile to talk to her, and about her. Obviously, I miss my Sinnavan. I miss my daily phone calls with her. I miss her voice. I miss her laugh, […]

It is what it is

May 25, 2026.Reading time 6 minutes.

My husband and I lit two candles on 15 May for sister number 3. As did my siblings and family. To mark her leaving us. I know … WHAT? This cannot be but it is. Even as I lit the candle, I was saying this is not right, this cannot be. It cannot be but […]

Remembering

May 18, 2026.Reading time 6 minutes.

In the first week, I visited two museums and walked in three parks. I watched a band at a local bar. Doing things, keeping busy should help. In the second week, my husband and I drove to Cherating in Pahang, and Terengganu for five nights. A change in scenery should help. Did it help? Yes and […]

What to do

May 11, 2026.Reading time 6 minutes.

The dominant thought, focus, theme of my every waking moment is my Sinnavan. I think of her. And, I think of her. I don’t want to. Seriously, I don’t. I don’t want to be sad and tearful. But I can’t help myself. Even when I’m doing things to keep my mind from thinking about her, […]

My Sinnavan

May 4, 2026.Reading time 6 minutes.

I’ve lost my sister. My best friend. My confidante. My second mum. My daily chat partner. Yes, everyday sister number 3 calls me between 12noon and 2pm, local time, depending on how long she has managed to sleep the night before in her home in London. When I’ve been out for lunch with family or […]

My mum

June 10, 2024.Reading time 6 minutes.

I asked my mum to wait for me. I touched her feet, something I rarely do, and said goodbye. I stepped out of the front door, and waved at her. She smiled, waved, and looked directly at me. She doesn’t do that when her Tamil serials are on. Her focus is usually the telly, and […]